maybe i'm just a hopeless romantic ...

but I've always felt like love was a noble act of self-giving.  The more you love, the more you lose a part of yourself.  But somehow, you don't become less of who you are.  In fact, you end up being complete.  Love isn't about finding someone you can live with.  It's about finding someone you can't live without.  When you love someone, you shouldn't give up without a fight.

so here's today's fight.  yes ... i DO think WE should be just as important as work and the children. That doesn't mean pushing the kids off to the background and ignoring their needs, or never staying late at work. It means making time for each other every day with a phone call to say hi or perhaps make sure that we have some quiet time together at the end of the day. It means setting aside a few hours each week to go out on a "date" and not discuss issues like bills, child-discipline, baby momma drama, etc.  it means sometimes setting aside my own wishes because yours needs are more important, and knowing that you will do the same for me, on occasion. It means complimenting each other, appreciating each other, and listening to what you say makes you happy -- and doing it even though i can't imagine why something like letting the guys hold a Super Bowl party at the house brings them so much satisfaction.

It means choosing the job offer that pays a little less or sounds a little less prestigious, if it means that you won't have as many of those weekend nights, can spend less time commuting, or are expected to be at work 40 hours a week instead of 55.  It also means that if I choose to be with you, someone who already has children, I am doing so with the understanding of the importance that the children play in your life, and we work together to balance your/our need to spend time with the children and give them emotional as well as financial support.

I just hope that you see that we CAN figure out a way to balance everyone's needs for attention, time, energy and love, and that we can develop the perspective to make this successful.