Do you know what I want ...?

Well ... there's a lot ... but let me start with this ... Some people have certain rules or expectations for who they want to date/be with/etc. Must be at least this old, this tall, this blah, that blah. But to be honest, are those truly the things that really matter? Well ... not to me. Not the things that really pinpoint the emotional satisfaction and well-being of our nature. Here's some of the things that I want ...

1)I want someone to appreciate me for me. Someone who comes into it from the beginning with ZERO expectations, and therefore is pleasantly surprised by everything that is known as 'me.'
"The best things in life are unexpected - because there were no expectations."
~ Eli Khamarov
"I do my thing and you do yours.  I am not in this world to live up to
your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are
you, and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, then it is beautiful.
If not, it can't be helped."
~ Frederick Perls

2)I want to be able to say what I'm feeling. Or what I'm thinking. And be stupid, and silly, and dumb. And say stupid things, like "I miss your face," and "That's dumb," and "I hate your guts," and "Sahmsing." Without people ... and 'that person' ... looking at me like I'm crazy. Or saying "you're cute" when you really just want to make fun of me.
"We are all a little weird. And life's a little weird. And when we find
someone else who's weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them,
and fall in mutual weirdness, and call it love."

3)Someone that can understand and accept me for me ... including all of the letters that are associated in describing me, lol. ADD, OCD, Type A, etc. After all ...it is what it is. I am who I am. Take it or leave it, certain things just won't change ...
"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure.  I make mistakes, I am
out of control, and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my
worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
~ Marilyn Monroe

4)I want someone who sees and knows and loves and appreciates my big heart ... and can help me love and nurture it and myself ... without taking advantage of it ... and me. Without it breaking ... again. Someone that can HELP me to help them, and everyone else in the world, lol. That appreciates that that is part of who I am. And doesn't try to change it. Or take advantage of it.
"Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit
with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. THAT'S
relativity."
~ Albert Einstein

5)Someone who is enough like me that we have common interests ... and we get along. And we can do things together, and enjoy ourselves. But someone that is different enough from me that they can teach me things. And broaden my horizons. And maybe even expand what I like ... so I can like MORE things :) And someone that I can do all the the aforementioned things for, as well.
"I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself, but for what you are
making of me. I love you for the part of me that you bring out."
~ Roy Croft

6) Someone that can understand that ... upon occasion ... I have anywhere from moderate to severe panic/anxiety attacks. Sometimes they are justifiable ... sometimes they are not. However, 100% of the time ... should I call on you for assistance in finding my way back to reality, I will expect you to navigate me back to some form of sanity.
"I can't ever imagine not being able to pick up the phone and talk to you.
You keep me sane. You remind me that no matter what's changed, there are some
things that remain ... and those things are what I cherish."


I am needy ... regarding certain things.  I will not even try to deny it. I am ... strange ... about certain things. But I like to think that that's part of what makes me me. My idiosyncrasies. My quirkiness. My ...me-ness :) I'm always going to reinvent certain aspect about myself ... that's just part of life. But there's just certain things that will never change. I will always laugh at things that probably aren't funny, and smile and things that no one else thinks matters. I believe in love, and arguing, and miracles. Sometimes I'll start a stupid argument over nothing. Either because we haven't argued in a while ... or just to prove I'm right. Sometimes ... arguing is just plain fun. But only if you argue back. I text people sitting next to me. I'm a text-a-holic. I have been known to randomly bust out in song. I am fully aware that I am not perfect, however I HATE admitting that I am wrong. I say random, stupid things just because they make me laugh. Like "sahmsing" and "panties." I probably share entirely too much of myself with the internet world ... via FB (yes ... I am a FB whore), and blogging (such as this), etc. I post multiple times a day ... not because I actually care if other people know what I'm doing, or because I think other people actually CARE what I'm doing, but more of an outlet to let my thoughts, feelings, etc get OUT of my head, and somewhere else. It's almost like if I type it out ... I don't have to think, worry, stress over it (whatever "it" may be ...) anymore. Sometimes it's because I want to tell someone something, but it's easier to voice it (or not, really, lol) here, by "not" voicing it. But mostly just getting it out.

So ... before I digress much further ... needless to say. I am me. This IS me. And I rather like me. Now ... the rest of the world just has to learn to deal with "me." :)